Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Turnovers

Our predictions for 2011 :

At Channel Sux . . .

• The station's morning team will (mercifully) fall apart, starting with simple-minded anchorette Maltard Maddox's decision to become a simple-minded stay-at-home mom. Doing what it does best, Channel Sux will make a bad situation worse by naming bland reporter Ann McIntire to replace Maltard.

J-Pa Knicely will announce his "retirement" in the sort of thinly-disguised shove-out-the-door accorded Knicely's equally vapid (and expensive) former partner, Pat Persaud, several years ago. 

Brian Mastre will assume J-Pa's throne, and Jimmy Thiedlecki will move his cornpone act into the Mastrebator's 4 p.m. anchor slot. 

• Weekend anchor Jamie McCutcheon will leave the station, reducing the number of competent on-air staff by one-third.

• SuxNews will spend most of the year orienting a dozen or so new on-air staff hired off whatever turnip trucks or clown cars happen to pass through town.

At KETV . . .

Brandi Petersen's maternity leave will give the station a chance to try out Melissa Fry as weeknight co-achnor. The result may prompt Petersen to stay home on a permanent basis.

• Meteorologist Bill Randby will leave Omaha for Florida, opening the way for Channel Sux's eminently capable Caitlin Roth to become KETV's chief weatherguesser. 

• Channel 7 viewers will continue to suffer from the station's 2010 decision to hire sleep-inducing Andy Kendeigh as its sports director.

• Like their colleagues up Farnam Street, staffers at 7 will continue the chore of orienting the latest influx of new reporters.

At KMTV . . .

• Channel 3rd will continue to languish, which might prompt competent management to consider hiring anchors that viewers might notice or remember. Fortunately for the incumbent anchor team, Channel 3rd is not burdened with competent management.

7 comments:

Derrell said...

star2009Please lord don't let bulletpoint #4 happen under WOWT, and please on everything that is holy, let bulletpoint #1 under KETV happen Amen

vernon-j said...

You think KMTV (the official news station of Vernon J) will languish. I heard someone say that KM3 will do quite well because there staff is cute. The other stations have 'less' than cute people.

I don't watch the other stations newscast they are less than 'alive' to me.

Dumb Anguish said...

Some more predictions:

Never one to let a KETV idea go to waste, WOWT will expand their dreadful Daybreak program to start at 4:30am. Jethro and Ellie Mae will complain even more often on air about how early they have to go to bed and how early they have to wake up.

Jim Flowers will predict a terrible snow storm with 6-8 inches. But we'll end up with a dusting.

WOWT reporter Jodi Baker will be continue to look, act and sound like a librarian.

Jim Flowers will predict flurries and we'll end up with 10 inches of snow.

All the news stations will quit pretending that random comments on Facebook constitute news (granted, that will never happen and is more of a dream)

Cogitor said...

@vernon-j:

Cute?! Two words to refute that contention: Sheila Brummer.

Brad said...

Jamie McCutcheon may be shown the door faster than you think. Last night she called the website a "Website" and not a "Web channel" and we all know that is strictly forbidden at wowt...

Brad
Omaha

N. Tumblin Rowland said...

If you've never lived in a larger city (or even ANY other city), you really can't appreciate what Omaha news, and specifically 6news, is. I live in a much larger city with morning news starting at 4:30. The anchors are personable, professional, educated, engaging, easy going with each other. In other words, not the lowest common denominator.

I'd love to be able to view channel six on my computer...just for a reality check to make sure I don't take my new city for granted.

Lois-Carmen said...

Hi Teddybear,

I predict that in 2011 Justin Joseph is mistaken for a real journalist at KDVR-Fox 31 in Denver.

Actually, that happened in 2010. God I can't believe nobody has noticed, you must have all been busy battling the daily heavy volume pressure and/or sun glare! (Now THERE is a good cause for Lee Terry, somebody needs to do something about that sun glare on I80). Anyway I was watching KDVR the other day and was haunted by a dramatic voice that took me back, oh about 59 markets... all the way back to #76. I couldn't believe my eyes or ears. And here I always thought Denver was the best local news market...

My how things have changed.

Lois-Carmen Denominator

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