Friday, February 13, 2009

Why?

During a writer's strike back in the late 1980s, David Letterman employed a segment entitled, "Hal Gurnee's Network Time-Killers" (Hal Gurnee was his longtime director). 

Now, twenty years later, Channel Sux has developed its own, albeit less entertaining, version: sixonline LIVE.

This handy feature brings together online chatting and local TV news, two things that go together like power tools and cranberries.

The whole thing works like this: SuxNews anchors announce excitedly that they've opened up the live chat on the "webchannel." A dozen or so idiot viewers then jump on their computers and start typing in things like, "Bring on Webber!!!!" and "I love John and Tracy!"

Then, rather than having to read boring old news stories, the aforementioned anchors chatter pointlessly in a postage-stamp-sized corner of a split screen showing the live chat as it's updated. Not that you can read much of what's on there. But that seems beside the point.

Now, we've seen a lot of stupid shit out of this station. LOTS of stupid shit. But this takes stupid to new levels of smelliness.

It's hard to imagine how this latest desperate attempt at relevance came to be. How many meetings between SuxNews management, consultants, and engineers did it take to come up with this gimmick? What can that discussion have been like?

The more these people try to get technologically "with it," the more they sound like George W. Bush discussing "The Google," and "rumors on the Internets."

Even more irritating is the fact that they can invest so much time and energy into this kind of worthless stunt, when they can't quite manage to get Maladroit Maddox to understand that it's called an economic downturn, not a "turndown," or get Cornpone Jimmy Thiedlecki to realize that Grand Island isn't "all the way across the state."

WOWT is one station that needs fewer time-killers and more bad-idea-killers.

12 comments:

Damon Scott Hynes said...

Just like that iReport crap on FOX and CNN. Get the public to send their vid, and: 1. you don't have to pay for the footage and 2. It reduces overhead a TON.

Murrow is spinning at 666 RPM.

The Black Sheep said...

Is there just nothing for 6 to report?! Granted, I'm not in the Omaha viewing area right now due to being in college, but still, if what you're saying is right, they're using valuable news time ... to report ... on what is being said ... on their own ... chatroom?!

Bob said...

I was watching Friday night and it was truly agonizing. J-Pa was fumbling all during the segment as they couldn't keep up w/ the comments and provide commentary at the same time.

I actually tried posting a couple of posts like "please stop this segment" and "your web channel is lame" using Gary Kerr and Dale Munson as my handle, but shockingly they didn't make it....

It's bad enough to have to watch Cornpone reader the viewer comments such as "I like your new TV's in the studio", but to do it live is just brutal.

TickerBoy said...

Ten minutes of non-stop news and your hour-by-hour forecast, Ten at Ten!

Great tease, very original.

Dumb Anguish said...

I had to laugh at the Gary Kerr mention. Can you imagine him trying to keep a straight face while pouring out this WOWT crap about a freaking CHAT ROOM on the nightly news?

The Black Sheep said...

The only thing that's keeping the real Gary Kerr from spinning in his grave over this shit is the fact that he's not dead.

Helio said...

It's a slow news day when you wake up to Jim & Malorie telling you about how Michael Vick's pit bulls have been re-habbed. What's the point? Someone is really out of touch.

Ted Brockman said...

No. That's a NORMAL day for Jimmy and Maltard. Someone could be holding the entire cabinet hostage on top of a skyscraper, and the pit bulls would be the thing these two nitwits zero in on. It's pathetic to the point you're almost embarrassed FOR them. But then you remember who you're talking about.

Cogitor said...

Well, neither one of them is the news director. They're not writing the pap they often read so poorly on the air (I'm sure they're not writing INNY of the stuff they're READEEN on the air). Six, like most other TV outlets including the networks, has moved off into infotainment, heading rapidly toward pure 'entertainment' news. It's a lot cheaper to produce junk than to hire competent professional people to seek and write real news, to hire people who know how the equipment works and can switch to the correct camera, to hire people who paid good money for the education that allows them to type 'taper' when they mean to lessen over time or distance instead of typing out 'tapper' and publishing it to the web, proving to the world that apparently details are now just for chumps. They're phoning it in, appealing to the lowest common denominator, doing the absolute least amount of work. That's why 'Deal or No Deal', the various reality TV shows (it chokes me every time I write that phrase), the tabloid shows and all of that other crap jams the airways. I guess that's about all we can expect to see until advertising revenue drops enough from people basically boycotting advertisers who support such useless shit.

operationseng said...

I would add to what Cogitor posted by saying; the networks have not only pared down those that actually know how to report the news, but have also pared down those behind the scenes that actually made the show work. They've actually managed to weed out anyone that really cared about their jobs and the product that they put out over the airwaves. The prime example of this is seen on the Big Sux with the constant misspellings on their graphics and the failure to turn mics off in the background. This crap generally did not happen when I was in the biz many moons gone. If it did; we certainly heard about it and took pains to make certain that it didn't happen again. We actually took pride in our work.

However; this is not just limited to the television industry, as evidenced in yesterday evening's Weird-Harold with a glaring headline on the front page of the Midlands section that spelled the word TEMPORARY in big, bold letters as TEMPOARY. (Perhaps Maladroit or Side-Splitty is working for them on the side)

Sadly; we cannot go home again...

Jeremiah said...

i saw one of the common typos on Channel Sux last night... the top story at four had the news story title behind brian mastre that said "art stoeln" Quite the mis print.

Justuss2012 said...

i think Jim Siedlecki is a C.I.A. plant, juss one among many locally and nationally

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