Monday, April 28, 2008

Brummed Out

Cross-eyed afternoon anchor Sheila Brummer is no longer a Sux News employee. She was let go late last week.

Well, it's a start. However, until the boneheads running that station stop hiring the inept, nothing will change.

Look at Six's recent hires: over-inflated KM3 retread Jodi Baker, E.T. lookalike Justin Joseph, blissfully ignorant Brian Latham, mop-headed weathergirl Andrea Rich, congenitally idiotic Rachel Pierce (and the list goes on and on). 

Compare that list of misfits with KETV's hires over the same period—Owen Lei, Kristi Andersen, Nicole Berlie, Marla Rabe, and Adrian Whitsett—and it's not hard to see why the ratings look as they do.




Sux 2 B 6

Read this. Hilarious.

Let this be a lesson to you kids out there: serial bad hires eventually catch up with you.

Monday, April 14, 2008

Nugget


OK, faithful readers, now it's your turn to make yourselves useful.

Last December, a Channel Sux control roomer with our sense of humor cut quickly from a taped story to a live shot of idiot loud-talking anchor Jimmy Thiedlecki picking his nose (trolling for breakfast, perhaps?). As soon as Jimmy saw he was caught, he quickly pulled out. It was priceless.

We DVR'd the whole ugly incident, but forgot to protect it from automatic erasure, and it disappeared before we could harvest a screencap of Jimmy panning for gold. So, if you happen to have caught the magic and can send a file for posting, we'll see that it finds a good home. It's so indicative of what a rube Jimmy really is, it'd be a shame not to share it with the rest of the class.

Friday, April 11, 2008

Hip

Dumbest new feature on TV? 

Gotta be Channel Sux's "High School Cribs."

This gem—apparently WOWT's attempt at connecting with the young people—is plagued by an annoying instrumental bed that sounds like something put together using GarageBand software and features cheerleader Malorie Maddox strutting toward the camera shouting, "You know what's cool about ___ High School?!! Their ____!"

Filling in the first blank isn't hard, even for the Suxers. What's truly amazing is how they fill the second one. 

Malorie seems startled that a school would have a newspaper, a lunch program,  or a place to buy sweatshirts. Really? You'd think that only someone who hasn't visited a classroom since the Coolidge administration would marvel that "Binson" (Benson) High School has a class where kids build stuff.

Our favorite moment, so far anyway, came during her awkward visit to Iowa School for the Deaf, where a shop teacher, without the slightest hint of irony, said, "Some of the kids, they're hard of hearing."

Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Clueleth

"And while you may not think of The Beatles when you think of rock and roll..."


—Channel Sux's Jimmy Thiedlecki, today, prattling about another inane "Top Six" list
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