Monday, October 16, 2006

Monotonous Mediocrity

One recent post asked if we were on vacation again.

We wish.

The explanation for the lack of posts on our part is this: nothing's happening. At least nothing that we haven't pointed out a dozen times.

For example, this morning, KETV substitute traffic twit Veronica Todd alerted viewers to anticipated congestion "between 90th and West Dodge." (For those of you reading this who aren't familiar with our neck of the woods: these two streets intersect.)

Or how about Sunday, when WOWT invisible anchor Paul Baltes read Saturday evening's copy about the shooting in Bonaparte, Iowa, that he said occurred "this morning." (Do these people just grab anything that happens to be laying around and read it on air to fill time?)

There's also speech-impeded weekend morning anchor Rachel Pierce, who is able to add a thshyllable to any word, as evidenced by her recent reference to actress "Scarlett Jo-HAN-uh-sun."

And WOWT weekend evening anchor Jaime McCutcheon, who regularly echoes the president's pronunciation of the word nuclear.

At KMTV, weekend anchor Devon Patton still speaks as if he's not quite over a bad case of lockjaw, and at KETV, with beady-eyed weekend anchor Suzanne "The Helmet" Deyo off on maternity leave, someone who apparently hates viewers has decided that FUBAR Fazal is a suitable Saturday night anchor. (We would agree, if by "anchor," they meant something to be dropped over the side of a boat.)

But we've written all this before. Only the particulars are slightly different.

Until something interesting happens, we'll keep our comments to a minimum, thank you.


Hosh said...

How can you say that kitty birth control is not a story? KETV did. Way more important than, oh, a minor earthquake. Maybe Fubar is running the whole show now...

MG73 said...

I loved the news crawl running on Saturday evening on KETV. Apparently there was an "11 yar old" boy missing.

Luckily, before I could go around the neighborhood asking, "Y'all see an 11 yar old boy in deez parts?", the boy came home.

Damon Scott Hynes said...

I had to hit Sean's site to find out what happened to Elizabeth Merriman. In any other organization, one could say she's been kicked up to management, but at 42 that's questionable.

mr. hap said...

speaking of questionable, what about 42's "webcaster". I would say newscaster, but upon seeing her clips, such a professional title is dubious at best.

joeygrisgris said...

I'm about as anti a husker fans as could be found, but that not withstanding.....the next time Todd Andrews (aka Mr. Calvert Collins) refers to the "'skers", will someone please do us all a favor and slap him?

Omababe said...

>Until something interesting happens,
>we'll keep our comments to a minimum,
>thank you.

Is this to mean that Omaha news is, uh, improving?

Melanie said...

Yar. Awesome. the news is speaking piratical now.

Jess said...

I agree with Hosh...
"kitty birth control" was well worth a story...oh and the fact that it's " sort of illegal and sort of not illegal"....that right there is some reportin'.

husker80 said...

There was that night that whoever was running the chiron at Channel Sux called him Brian "New" instead of "Neu".

BTW, Calvert and Todd are no longer together.

DiggerDog said...

At least Veronica Todd is attractive. Now, only if she would get rid of the jackets and wear more tight fitting clothes, her ratings would sky rocket.

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