Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Sufferin' Succotash

• A producer at Channel 6 must have a sense of humor. What else could explain having lisping anchor Jim Siedlecki announce another inane "Top 6 List" that forced him to say "Top Six Cities for Shortest Commutes"? Even if there was no ulterior motive behind it, hearing Jimmy spray his way through the title provided a brief bit of entertainment in what has again become a monotonous broadcast.

• Someone needs to give an award to Journal Broadcasting for taming the hair of KMTV's females. The station that a year ago was a haven for all manner of bad cuts has, in the past few months, given anchors Deb Ward and Mary Weeyums considerably downsized coiffes. It's amazing how much easier these people are to watch when you're not distracted by hair that looks like storm damage.

• It may be a very long time before we complain about weekend anchor Suzanne Deyo, now that the geniuses at Channel 7 scared the shit out of us by plopping Fubar Fazal behind the anchor desk on Saturday. Does Fazal have pictures of management in compromising positions? Is she slobbin' somebody's knob? Why won't they stop subjecting viewers to this woman? She's not getting any better! We can think of at least a half-dozen KETV reporters who are better candidates for the anchor desk than Fubar. Why not use one of them?!

13 comments:

joeygrisgris said...

Fubar slobbin' someone's knob? EWWWW!!!!! EWWWWW!!!!!! EWWWWWWW!!!!Make the visual stop, pllllleeeeaaaasssse. Gives a whole new meaning to the term "camel toe".

O-Newsie said...

Yeah, and with Suzanne about ready to pop, I wonder if they'll have Fubar doing the weekend news while Deyo is out on maternity leave?

Let us pray NOW that it won't happen like that!

Obbop said...

Why allow a voice so grating upon the sensitive cilia to inflict such pain upon the consumer?

What is the motive?

I am so thankful for the Interweb. I can get the news from that source, not relying upon the lame spewing of the local broadcasters.

Also, the news is censored hereabouts to the point that I feel as if I am a comrade in the Motherland where TASS ensures I only hear, see and read what the ruling elites want me to be exposed to.

Of course, being surrounded by all the Big Red buffoonery the local masses don't want to be informed of reality anyway.... as long as there is ample Big Red balderdash filling the local yokel's meaningless sheep-like lives.

So, I guess it really doesn't matter how attrociously obnoxious the Fubar thing and all the other teleprompter readers are and how unAmerican the controlling powers are that expose the backwoods idiotic locals to so little of the news that actually affects the Union, our lives and the various sytems affecting us.

But, as long as KMTV repetitively babbles about the first hundred cars receiving 99-cent per-gallon motion lotion at a local gas station all is okie dokie in Big Red land.

IRule & USUCK said...

There's 99 cent gas? Where?? Have you given consideration to the fact that there is little you can do in regards to the "reality" that you see on the "other" news sources that you don't see locally. Typical hippie reaction...let's burn something and walk around with signs. That'll change things for sure. The only thing that the protests of the 60's did was undermine a war and destroy the social fiber of America.

Melanie said...

Why did you say "slobbering someone's knob" when it comes to Fubar, I'm going to be having some creepy-ass nightmares about that now, jeesh...

Melanie said...

Well said! I rule & U Suck.

gerrishnut said...

I miss you Courtny Gerrish. Please come home soon.

joeygrisgris said...

Irule, on behalf of all the hippies out here, may i just say.......pfffffffffffffffttttttt.

rickoxo2 said...

irule & usuck RULES!

Hippies suck. The 60's sucked. Protests where they chant some dumb poem sucks.

"Hell no, we won't go!" Wow, you managed to make a 5 word rhyme. Nice job. Get back in your Jetta.

Kevin said...

It sounds as if someone has an inferiority complex. Writing poorly punctuated, flowery prose, posing as an intellectual, and calling Omahans “idiotic backwoods locals” is a pathetic attempt at turning inferiority into superiority.

As for me, I turn to local news for…local news. If I need information about the rest of the world I can turn to any of a number of news providers, such as CNN, MSNBC, or Fox. Some of the stories presented on the local outlets are weak and obviously fillers for slow news days, but in my humble opinion, it’s not all bad that real news is slow. The old axiom, “No news is good news”, means that life in this big little city is good.

That being said, I would like to see Omaha return as the springboard for national news personalities, rather than as the dumping ground for the failed and doomed to fail.

soccerfan said...

Oh come on guy's - we are all pigs and don't tell me that if you were feeling the need and she was willing, you'd let just about any woman "slob your knob" -

rickoxo2 said...

I wouldn't. Fubar and Camryn Mannheim are pretty far down on the list, like dangling at the bottom, of knob-slobberers.

soccerfan said...

You're a better man than me - and probably a little more "blue" too!!
Just kidding - in general, we have all done it at least once.

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