Thursday, February 16, 2006

Snowbotch

This morning we found ourselves torn: should we watch local stations soil themselves over the prospect of 1-3 inches of snow or bask in the otherworldliness of the infomercial on KPTM that used phrases like "caked-on fecal matter"? Turns out there wasn't much difference.

Our favorite moments from Channel 7's exaggerated coverage:

Elictia Hammond standing on Douglas Street, just feet from the station's front door, pointing, as cars zoomed by at 35 m.p.h., to a two-foot-wide patch of snow that was maybe five flakes deep.

Andrea Bredow announcing in her most authoritative voice (which isn't very) that "moisture is making it to the ground."

• The cake-topper, however, came from superfluous in-studio beauty-pageant-has-been/traffic reporter Jana Murrell who, at least twice, exhorted viewers to keep their speeds down so that "we can turn those major-injury accidents into minor fender-benders!"

God Bless John Oakey. There must be days when he feels like he's doing volunteer work with the mentally retarded.

11 comments:

wolfteeth said...

Agreed.

How much did it cost KETV to have Chuck McWilliams (The BEST meterologist in Omaha) cover for Bredow this morning? What the hell does "slickery" mean? This is typical of her every morning. I am an avid cyclist and depend on morning weather. Needless to say, she is NOT a meterologist. Her apathetic approach to weather and lack of detail and focus is aggravating. Obviously, do you ever see her covering severe weather in primetime--or even cover for Chuck or Bill?

What the heck was Hammond doing standing and scraping her feet across river rock to prove how slick it was outside? Thanks Hammond, thanks to you we'll stay on the sidewalk and away from the river rocks.

What a joke.

Thank goodness for Oakey.

Hosh said...

"Volunteer work wit the mentally retarded" may be one of the funnier phrases I've ever heard. The mental picture is hysterical.

Virus Human said...

If I was John, I'd have no qualms about drinking on the job or drinking at 7 a.m.

Ladd said...

I stumbled on this website while reading the Ground Zero Blog on the Urinal Star website. WoW! Great! Bravisimo! It's about time somebody punch a hole in the egos and self-congratulatory manner of Omaha newscasters. I can't think of any worse fearmongering, plastic-faced, snob-nosed waste-os like the those at WOWT. BLAH! I live in Lincoln, and don't much care for Omaha, although I'm sure most of the people are nice. Thanks for sharing your commentary! This great!

Andrew Wees said...

Chuck didn't cover this morning. Andrea was there and chuck did the report on conditions outside the studio.

Tóózy said...

Hey, I'm starting to appreciate Andrea. Enjoyable in a "favorite chubby niece" sort of way. And they all do seem to use proper grammar (unlike me), to butcher the morning news. I bring this up because of Michelle Bandur on Channel Third at 5:00. She was live for the car wreck resulting from a high speed chase by the State Patrol. She kept talking about the perp "driving CRAZY." She sounded more than a bit uneducated. Then Greg used the same sentence on the 10:00 report. Is there not anyone at Channel Third proof reading? Crazy is an adjective, NOT an adverb. OK 3, keep up and i will provide you the proper usage. You drive CRAZILY, you are CRAZY and I'm ANNOYED by the basic misuse of grammar by so called professionals.

wolf-feet said...

Thanks for clearing that up, Andrew.

Thank goodness Chuck was there to hold her hand and report on the conditions--"outside the studio".

THAT IS WHERE THE WEATHER IS!!!

Im glad Andrea could report on conditions "inside" the studio.

Did they have any accumulation or moisture in the newsplex? Or "slickery" conditions??

wolf-feet said...

I would like to add that Andrea is the most attractive tv personality in Omaha. She is intelligent and has great style.

I just wish she would focus and give more effort to becoming a top meterologist.

DiggerDog said...

Wolf Feet, you're wrong. Here, let me correct your incorrect opinion. Bredow is the chunkiest TV personality in Omaha. Not the most attractive. The most attractive is Courtny Gerrish. That is until she leaves for Milwaukee. Once she's gone, Omaha will be without an attractive TV personality. Deyo could be, however she would require a trip to her friendly neighborhood plastic surgeon for some "improvements" then a wardrobe of noting but light colored sweaters.

HTH

Man, I should be in charge of all on-air "talent" hiring.

AvidOmahaNewsViewer said...

I just love reading this blog. I almost busted a gut when I read the comments about Chuck McWilliams being the best meteorologist in Omaha and Andrea Bredow being the most attractive TV personality in Omaha. You guys WERE joking, right?

Obbop said...

Yes, the gallery was joshing.

There can be no doubt that Travis (my little buddy) Justice is far and away the cutest little critter gracing our TVs.

Note: it's "Travis" not "Travesty."

And, as for talent...... Travis is hands-down the most capable teleprompter reader in the area.

Whadda' guy!!!!

Hollywood Hunk looks, excellent taste in ties, photogenic to the max, Trav has it all!!!!!!!!!

By golly, if I ever accidently make a baby I think I'll name the tyke...........

Uhhhhhh....... I'll name the mini-human Travis!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sure hope it ain't a girl-type kidling.

While I'm here, did any y'all witness the Sunday Feb. 19 channel 3 ACTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!! news 5:30 pm broadcast? The male reader of teleprompters had difficulty enunciating the words. Nervousness? Yeah, could be. But, before going public shouldn't these rookies have practiced enuff to be past the "nervous stage?"

Heck, with what I've seen appearing on cultural backwater newscasts I could do a better-than-average job of babbling away in front of those cameras.

Of course, nobody likes us old fat guys with those pesky hairs growing out of our nostrils. And, I'd have to comb my remaining hairs, shave and brush the tooth so.... to heck with it.

Bye

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