Monday, May 23, 2005

Counterprogramming Against Pat's Retirement, Step 1: Have Julie Talk About Sex

It's probably just our dirty minds at work, but KETV anchor Julie Cornell's "diary" this week—on the topic of abstinence—seems to be especially full of thought-provoking phrases.

It probably didn't help that the "Julie's Diary" email announcing the stories started with this line: "An abstinence trainer wants your child to have mind-blowing sex -- just not right now." Some other examples:

• "STDs are going up in virgins." (Note to self: There is no situation in which the phrase "going up in virgins" doesn't sound dirty).

• "Gretna students will be exposed to an abstinence message by a motivational speaker" (as in, "My name is Matt Foley and I'm a ..."?).

• "The number one reason children wait to have sex, is because their parents told them to do so," Kocian said. "We need to turn these kids around." (Huh?)

• "We know we don't have one golden bullet." (No, but we'll bet they have a whole rack of 'em at Dr. John's.)


King Vernon said...

STD's up in virgins!! How the heck is that possible? Sexually transmited Diseases? Don't you have to have sex to get one, which would exclude you from being a virgin?

omatvwatcher said...

Are you kidding me? If you can't figure that one out then you're hopeless...

Ted Brockman said...

No graphic details here, but if you want the answer, check out Julie's Diary on the KETV website. It'll answer your question without getting too graphic.

pia said...

Hey at least she dares to talk about it! It's "far better" to pretend like it doesn't happen -Right! Obviously NO teenagers in your house. Who the hell wants to talk about sex to kids???

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